Words, phrases, comments! They have an impact on our day, week, month, life. What people say to us can change the mood we are in and can help or hinder us. It’s true. I used to say the old saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”. But do we mean that. Have you ever been hurt by words? Raise your hand if you have ever been personally victimized by Regina George? ...haha! Mean girls reference, but I believe we all know a Regina George or have/had one in our life.
See here’s the thing. We live in a society where people find comfort in making others feel small. Because they feel BIG while making them feel small. Most of the time these people have been damaged by something so they are fixing themselves while destroying you. Unfortunately, this happens a lot.
We all can be smart alecks! Some people know how to use it to be funny and use it at appropriate times and others, well, let’s just say their timing is horrible. Horrible!!! And let me say this. Just because we have free speech and are able to talk....doesn’t mean we need to say ever thought that enters our head. Let’s think before we speak!
Take this for example!
All you pregnant women out there. You are beautiful and doing amazing! They don’t want to hear....wow! Your belly is huge. You look like you don’t feel good? Are you having twins because you are large? You must be due soon, you’re getting big. Do you think you should be eating that while pregnant?
With both my kids. I gained a lot of weight. I was also very swollen, especially with MJ, but the comments from people just plain hurt. And I still remember each one. And I have talked to others and they have said the same thing.
Nice comments go a long way. It’s not just pregnant women that are affected by this. People make comments to everyone. And I’m not sure whether people are just super negative, don’t know they are doing it, if they have no filter, or if they find joy in putting others down. Don’t know! All I know is that words...Words are hard to forget! And you remember them.
The enemy! Oh! He tries to plant things in our minds and get us to think about what that person said, did. He tries to get us to hold on to that grudge. And what happens is we try to get back at that person or it does effect us, but it effects everything in our life. And every time we see that person we remember what was said.
Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. Colossians 4:6 ESV
See some people don’t see your sarcasm as sarcasm. And it’s all about the presentation of how and when you deliver it. And I’m not saying that we have to walk on pins and needles around people, but I am saying no one wants to hear these phrases come out of your mouth! Have some tact and respect for yourself and others.
“No offense, but....”
“You really shouldn’t eat that!”
“When are you going to have kids?”
“You don’t look very good today!”
“Are you pregnant?”
“You need to do better!”
“You look tired!”
“Why are you wearing that?”
“Do you really like that color?”
“Are you trying to lose weight?”
“Oh, that style must be back!”
“Don’t take this personally, but....”
“You really shouldn’t let your kids eat that!”
“Did you even parent your kids?”
And there are more. And I know we all have been there and made a rude comment to someone and not intended for it to be harmful, but think before you speak and ask yourself, “would you want them to ask you that?”
Most of the time the answer will be, No!
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29 ESV
Sometimes we are in a very vulnerable state and need some encouragement...we don’t need your opinions or your views on the situation. Unless we ask! But we need encouragement, love, and respect.
I want to lift people up with my words and not make them feel put down or worse. I know that I have done this because I’m not perfect, but that just means I can work on it and be more intentional about what is coming out of my mouth.
And in those times when someone says something rude or hurtful, please know that you can nicely say something back to them. Even if you don’t necessary want to. You can state truth! — especially if someone is trying to put you down.
State TRUTH in as nice of a way as possible. And remain calm. I know, I know! We usually want to react, but react in a calm, reasonable way. And also, there are just some people who are just rude and have no tact about them. You don’t need those type of people in your life. You don’t! You don’t need the negativity and all that comes with them. There are just some people like that and we must make the decision to say, bye Felicia! Haha!
And this time of year you would think it would be happy, positive comments, but holidays are horrible for people and their attitudes and rude comments. So, let’s just say this. As a Christmas present to each other let us forgive those that have spoken negative comments, words, or done things to us. And let us remember how we felt when it was done to us so we will do our best not to do it to others.
Control yourselves. Be on your guard. Your enemy the devil is like a roaring lion. He prowls around looking for someone to chew up and swallow. 1 Peter 5:8
Speak Kindness and Love even if others don’t, be different !
Love and Prayers,